Is My Ex Allowed to Call a Babysitter if I Can Take the Kids?

 Posted on May 13, 2025 in Child Custody

Child custody orders, known as parenting plans or parenting agreements, are designed to give both parents meaningful time with their children and to support their children’s best interests after a divorce or separation. But what happens when one parent needs child care during their scheduled time and the other parent is available and willing to step in? Does the first parent have to offer that time to the other parent, or can they simply call a babysitter?

This question is often answered by a term known as "the right of first refusal," and whether it is included in your parenting plan. Our Frisco, TX child custody attorney can help you understand whether this important clause should be part of your divorce decree or parenting plan. 

What Is the Right of First Refusal?

The right of first refusal is a provision in a custody order that gives one parent the opportunity to care for the children before the other parent hires a babysitter or leaves the children with someone else for an extended period of time. This is not a standard part of every Texas custody arrangement, but it can be added through agreement or requested by the court.

The provision is often triggered when the parent with scheduled custody will be unavailable for a set number of hours. For example, if one parent has to attend an overnight work trip, they may be required to contact the other parent first to see if they want to care for the child before making alternate arrangements.

This kind of clause helps ensure that children spend as much time as possible with their parents rather than with third parties. It also reduces conflict and confusion about childcare decisions.

What Happens If the Right of First Refusal Is Not in Your Order?

If your parenting plan does not include a right of first refusal, then technically, your ex may have the legal right to leave the children with a babysitter during their time — even if you are available and willing to care for them. While this may feel frustrating or unfair, the court cannot enforce something that was never included in the custody order.

This is why detailed parenting plans are so important. In high-conflict situations or when trust is limited, specific provisions like the right of first refusal can create structure and reduce miscommunication. They also provide a legal basis for enforcement if the other parent refuses to follow the agreement.

How to Address the Right of First Refusal in Texas

If you believe that your current parenting plan does not reflect what is best for your children, you may be able to seek a modification. Texas courts will consider changes when there has been a material and substantial change in circumstances, or when a more specific arrangement would better serve the child.

When seeking to include a right of first refusal, courts will look at factors such as:

• How well the parents communicate

• The proximity of their homes

• The child’s age and schedule

• The history of cooperation between parents

The court's primary concern is always the child’s well-being. If your proposal shows that offering additional parenting time would be stable, appropriate, and beneficial to the child, the court may be willing to modify the order accordingly. 

If you already have the right of first refusal in your parenting plan, our attorneys can help you enforce it. 

Contact a Collin County, TX Child Custody Attorney

If you are dealing with disagreements over babysitters, parenting time, or modifying your custody arrangement, it may be time to speak with an attorney. A Frisco, TX child custody lawyer at Moore Family Law, P.C. can help you understand your rights, draft strong parenting plans, and petition for changes when necessary. Call 214-764-8033 to schedule a consultation and protect your time with your children.